It's the holidays, so in a few words: Three talented DJs go to the end. Yonny, P and M Squared. Another below average set from K Sly finally gets her elimintated. DJ P's records blow off the turntables while performing on a boat in the uber corny "Yacht Challenge". Amber Rose embarrases all of humanity once again by opening her trap.  Just Blaze went for the Fonzworth Bentley look. Another rented crowd. More beats by Dre product placement . Super-Cheesy on screen graphics featuting the "throttle" meter that was supposedly controled by the level of excitement in the crowd....WOW. Looking forward to the final! Congrats to the worthy competitors. 

    A scratch challenge in NYC…hmmm, that sounds vaguely familiar. It took place in some weird warehouse filled with strange dimly lit headless figures. There were also some mannequins there. But seriously, you'd think with a budget like Smirnoff could put upthe show would be able to rent more than 30 extras for the day to make the room look full. The Rules of the challenge were simple. Two minutes for each DJ to put down their best scratch routine. Even though most of the contestants should not be able to even say the word 'scratch' they all seemed supremely confident in their abilities.  Even our friend Jameson Hill.

      I'll spare the boring details and just say that everyone else aside from DJ's Yonny and P was sadly disappointing. Sloppy cuts, uncontrolled juggles and off beat backspins drowned out any good parts that might have stood out. The sets  were all equally bad with the exception of Jameson Hill who was absolute trash. As if he hadn't already proved that fact several times over, this episode put the final nail in his coffin. He did scratch for a few seconds, but the rest of whatever he was doing was unlistenable. Somehow he thought he was, and I quote "...giving the crowd a gift" by throwing a record into it and hitting a spectator in the face. If that wasn't enough he opened up a plastic wrapped cookie, ate half and then threw the remainder at the crowd while he played Cookie Monster's anthem  "c is for cookie" Unreal. Never seen anything like it.

      Kid Capri and the other judges got rid of Jameson Hill right away in the elimination. Even as his head rolled off the set his dying brain managed to get  a few words out of his mouth in self defense. Of course they had no effect and he was quickly and rightfully disposed of.  I was puzzled when K-Sly was praised by Kid Capri for her set which was again, super BORING. I thought it was a scratch challenge not a make Kid Capri get up and move with some played out breakbeats challenge. She continued her  tradition of just being capable enough to get by in my opinion.  While her set was not the worst, it was certainly not the piece of work that Kid made it out to be. Three words.  Simple. Dated. Underwhelming.  The judges gave her the cocktail after Yonny as if to say she was second best when clearly DJ P had a more entertaining set with better scratching. I thought it was about scratching and using the turntable as an instrument, no?

      It came down to Energizer and Msquared at the bottom. K sly should have been there in Msquared's place for sure. He obviously is the better DJ. His set just was not clean at all and thats the performance he was judged on.  Energizer fought his executioners to the bitter end but eventually he walked off with no cocktail. End of the line. I'm still in awe that K Sly has gone this far and DJs like Mel Starr and Eclipse are not there. I guess just being good enough to pass  earns you a full scholarship in the DJ world.

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     I'll keep it as short as I can this week. Aside from the once again ridiculous elimintaions, this was the best episode yet. It was soley about the DJs ability to mix and keep the crowd happy with the music. This weeks Challenge was to rock a house music set in a city known for its house music. Chicago.  The twist was each DJ had to play to random requests given to them by selected crowd members. What I didnt like is they based the whole challenge on the fact that requests are something that DJs hate more than anything. I dont agree with that at all. Requests are a really annoying part of the job at times but if you are spinning at a familiar place or for  a crowd that knows good music, being able to play somebodys request adds something to the party for the DJ and the people. If im in the middle of a 90's Hip Hop set and some random drunk chick asks for Britney Spears or Katy Perry then im of course infuriated. But Im not angry because she made a request. I'm upset 'cuz shes a fucking dumbass in my face disturbing me with ignorance and bad breath.  Over the years my tolerance for drunken morons has been worn away to nothing. With that in the air I have to say that all the pre-determined 'request' tracks chosen for the DJs were classics and should have been easy to blend in. Suprisingly, some had a really hard time and their sets reflected it. Chicago let them know what time it was as well. Almost every DJ got boo'ed. I've only been boo'ed twice and both times were very early in my career and for 2 different reasons. Having that happen is humiliating and humbling. If it doesn't make you a better DJ right away, you should quit and sell off your equipment. I respect a crowd that can let someone know they are failing miserably and  I wish it happned in the mainstream top 40 clubs where all the 'douchebag' wanna be rich boy celelbrity DJs get a way with murder nightly. It was hard to watch it all go down but thouroughly enjoyable at the same time.

     The Eliminations almost negated every other good aspect of the episode. Each challenge for 6 weeks K-Sly's bad mixing, low energy and lack of all around skill has landed her at the bottom of the pack. This week for the first time she didnt completly suck so the judges award her the win. Thats crazy. To top all that off she had the nerve to get on the mic and say "... i wanna apoligize on behalf of the other DJs that came on before me that were fuckin' up". While that did display some balls it was in poor taste and disrespectful for no reason. She said she was standing up for her women hood when questioned about it later but that came off as a pathetic defense. Not to mention she simply played records and took no risks in the set. Displayed no talent or energy and ended up being totally boring. Again. I'm sure she realizes that creating drama and acting agressive is the only way she can survive on the show. Hence last weeks attack on the crowd in DC and this weeks attack on the other DJs. Nevertheless she walks off with a drink leaving the other more talented DJs to hang in the wind.  Yonny had a dope set as well as DJ P. Jameson was weak but passble. However, he had the nerve to chastise Yonny for doing some light scratching in his set saying in more or less words you should never scratch over house music. Especially in Chicago. As if he has any knowledge about scratching, house music or Chicago.

     In the end it came down to Mel Star and Energizer. While all of the competitors recieved criticism, Mel Star stopped his set with one full minute left on the clock for some reason, ultimately sealing his fate. Energizer lost the crowd early never getting them back after some painful transitions.  Even though he didn't finish the challenge,  Mel Star's set was far better and more interesting technically. Of course he also pulled it off with no headphones. Whether he quit or not Mel Star did not deserve to be eliminated. Cutting him made no sense and further cements my theory that the winners and losers of each challenge have been set up from the jump or are at least written in on the fly depending on the outcome of a DJs set.  We'll see what happens next week. 

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     I don't know where to begin so I'll start by saying that if you can get passed the sensationalism, exploitation and derivative writing it's still a win for real DJ's to be seen representing skill on national television. I hope those that DO believe the overwritten hype,  pre-fabricated situations, and other shenanigans are noticing the difference between real and fake as It  clearly gets demonstrated. Although the outcome of the elimination states otherwise, this weeks episode was no exception.

     I was actually jealous of the contestants in that their challenge was to rock with a live band during their performance. The "anything can happen jam session" is unique and something that I love doing. It gets harder and harder to come by today because most tour DJ's are just as programmed as club and radio DJs. Same sets night after night for the same crowds of people. Having the chance to do what they did would have been a lot of fun. The goal was to rock a two minute "solo" during a song that was chosen from the bands playlist.  Two minutes isn't a lot of time but its enough to really get down and do something special if you know how to go at it. Since I can't really judge the crowds reaction due to editing I had to go off of the audio tracks. What I heard was mostly a waste of time. Literally. Big up to the show and whoever came up with this challenge though because it was never more clear who deserved to be there and who didn't. DJ P once again won the challenge with only vinyl. I didn't really like what I heard of his or anyone else's set for that matter, but P didn't have 20,000 songs and obscure acapellas with cue points  to work with. Just some wax he brought along for the trip. Jameson Hill further exposed himself for the ignorant, inexperienced fraud that he is. I guess every court needs a Court-Jester. When the smoke and mirrors of the club atmosphere was removed and it came down to just the music with real musicians at his side it was obvious he had no business being in the building. He even started rapping to over compensate for his non-ability as a DJ. I gotta give it to him though, he's the only guy on the show who managed to disgrace DJs and MC's in the same two minute set.  Even worse than his offensive and disrespectful antics was K Sly's train wreck of a set. There is no way to blame that on any editing. I know what I heard. Nothing mixed, terrible selection, no technical ability, no charisma and on top of that she abused the crowd when they apparently let her know she was stinking up the gym. DC ain't no punk and I'm glad to see that people there still let a muthafukka know its time to get off the tables if thats what happened. Why is she there again? The other Djs didn't really impress me but I was still trying to figure out why they didn't do more. Maybe it was just the heat of the moment and the circumstances at the time. I'll never know because this show doesn't exactly inspire DJs to give their best performances.

     I now believe that the outcome of these eliminations is chosen, or at least very heavily influenced by people other than the judges. If there is some other reason to explain why K sly is still there and Total Eclipse isn't, or why Kid Capri told Jameson Hill "…you absolutely showed me what a real DJ is" , would someone from the show please contact me and tell me. Not that they need a valid reason, I just can't believe for one second that Kid Capri, the legendary internationally respected, world renowned Hip Hip Icon known for being a pioneer DJ/Producer would consider for one second putting his reputation on the line for a dumb-ass like Jameson Hill. He commended Jameson for grabbing the mic and showing what a DJ is supposed to do if the crowd isn't feeling you or if he feels like its not going his way. Take control and get them back in your pocket however you have to. This is true, but he is forgetting the most obvious and important  point. In order to get in front of that crowd and even be in a position to lose them in the first place you should at least be a fucking DJ! You should be able to fulfill certain prerequisites in order to get the job where you lose your crowd. I've seen sound men rap better than him when the power is out. That doesn't mean the sound man should be a DJ. It shouldn't matter whether Total Eclipse scratched for too long. The fact is he CAN and Jameson can't. Do all those years spent practicing count for nothing because people were impressed with a bullshit rap at a fake party? It shouldn't matter that some of the other DJs need to work on their mixing because in the end most at least know how to mix. Any music in any situation. Jameson doesn't. That is the only thing that matters.  Even though the crowd may have been entertained, he disrespected every DJ there and Kid gave 'em a pass? Really? Why? Would they rather let a baffoon loose in the clubs of the world with further encouragement? All he did was prove he cant DJ and can act like an ass. Reinforcing the very stereotypes and images this show should inherently be breaking down. Why not give a talented musician some heavy handed criticism so he improves as a DJ and person to become what Smirnoff is after? After all, no master is ever born a master. To hear the words "…you total-e sucked" come out of Kid Capri aimed at Total Eclipse was pretty shocking. Especially when the people who really "totally sucked" were people he (or Smirnoff) gave passes to. I respect Kid Capri immensely for who he is and what he has done for the world of music and will forever. After watching that I just respect him a little less. The She-Devil who shall not be named chimed in adding "Eclipse...you played let me clear my throat for 5 mins." Unlike Jameson, he at least played something and tried to do something with it. I wonder how many times she's tried to clear her throat for 5 mins. I think she should stick to putting things in her mouth so we all don't have to hear the things coming out of them. 

     Mixing the talented with talentless in a competition where the rules and boundaries are loose and skill doesn't matter is sure to generate controversy. I think in the end its a positive thing because at least DJ'n is a topic of discussion on the table where it might not have been before. The difference between a good DJ and a bad one seems to be so subjective now but maybe people might see it here and take it into the real world. Hopefully it will lead to a higher standard and the public tolerating less bullshit. Not likely, but worth keeping in the back of my mind. 

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